and i'm falling into you
by kohee
Summary: It's supposed to be only a ruse, because she was undercover and he couldn't ruin the operation. But sometimes, things can spill into real life. Barba/Benson


one-shot; _and I'm falling into you_ _  
_pairing: rafael barba/olivia benson  
word count: 3177 words  
note: extended scene from the last drabble in my drabble collection, chapter 45 of notes on paper. You don't necessarily need to read that to get this – I basically summarised the drabble as a starting point. My warning for this one-shot: essentially porn without plot.

 _begin_

Barba stalks into his apartment, loosening his tie, and flinging it onto his couch. He heads straight towards his kitchen, taking his favourite scotch from the shelf. Not bothering with a glass, he tilts the bottle straight into his mouth, taking a good few gulps.

He's all hot, bothered and edgy, and it's _all her fault_.

It was just supposed to be a normal, run-of-the-mill, walk home. And it was that, until he ran into her, involved in an undercover vice operation with her team. She was standing at that street corner, dressed in next to nothing, and knee high boots. Caught off his guard, he had stopped, and was on the precipice of blowing the entire operation when she sprang into action, shoving him up against the wall and playing her role perfectly.

It took him about two minutes to get it, but he eventually did, and he had played along just as perfectly, until Fin masterfully interjected and set things back on track.

At least, he thought he was playing. But he can still remember how soft and warm her skin felt beneath his fingers, and he can still feel her teeth tugging on his earlobe.

A rush of heat overcomes him and Barba growls in frustration. He takes another gulp of scotch and considers his options.

He could either take a very long, very cold shower, or he could go for a run.

Barba unsnaps his suspenders and starts unbuttoning his shirt, walking into his bedroom. He rids himself of his work clothes, and shrugs on a Harvard t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants.

He's opting for the run. He needs to work off all the energy and frustration solely caused by Olivia Benson.

* * *

It doesn't work, not really.

He's been running for the past hour, but Barba still couldn't manage to get her out of his head. Or the way she had made him feel, pressing against him, looking at him with those dark, smoky brown eyes.

"Fuck," he curses under his breath, as he slows to a stop outside his apartment complex. He pushes open the front door with a defiant air, and jogs up the stairs to his unit. As he turns around the corner, he stops, and stares.

Liv is standing outside his door, her back against the wall, her arms crossed. She's still dressed in the same clothes she had on whilst undercover. Which means, she isn't wearing much at all.

He's this close to doing an about-face and bolting out into the night again. He can't handle this, at least, not in the way he should be handling it. But Rafael Barba is not a coward, and he always, _always_ , faces things head on. So he steels himself, and walks to up her, carefully arranging his features into a neutral expression. She sees him walking towards her, and she straightens herself.

He really kind of hates the fact that she's towering a good two inches above him, even if those boots help to show off her legs to their best advantage.

"Liv," he says. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh…the operation wrapped up a while ago, we got our guy, and...okay, that is all kind of irrelevant." She twists her fingers together, and then trains her eyes on his. "Look, Barba," she says in a rush. "I just want to say I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" He echoes, albeit taken aback by the apology.

"Yeah, look…" she runs a hand through her teased hair and sighs. "I felt…well, I pushed you into that situation. I just want to make sure that you're okay, that we're okay."

He throws her a look. "I'm fine, Liv, and we're fine. I understand that you were undercover with the squad. If anything, I should be apologising, I nearly ruined your operation."

"Well, you didn't," she grins. "That was very quick thinking on your part, not that I'm surprised at your ability to improvise."

"I'm glad you approved," he says sarcastically.

She frowns a little at his tone. "I thought you said you're okay. But now you're sounding kind of pissed off."

He's _not_ pissed off; he's frustrated, _sexually_ frustrated, and it doesn't help at all that she's standing in front of him in that ridiculous get-up.

"I'm not pissed off," he retorts.

Liv's frown deepens, as she takes a step closer to him. "Really? Could've fooled me."

" _Fine_ , maybe I am, a little."

"I thought you said you understood."

"I did, but…but…" is he really at a loss for words? This has never happened to him. _Never_. "Look, can we just leave it? And can you just go? I have a grand inquiry at eight in the morning tomorrow, and I need to get some sleep."

A hurt look crosses her face, followed by anger. She steps closer to him, and jabs a finger against his chest. "You are _such_ an ass, Barba. If you have a problem with what had happened, then tell me, and we'll work through it. But if you want to lie, and then be angry at me without telling me why, then go ahead, be a fucking child."

"Fine, I'll do just that." he says curtly.

"Fine," she snaps back.

They glare at each other, neither willing to give in and be the first to break the eye contact. The tension crackles between them, and she suddenly realises that she's in close proximity to him; so close that she can see his eyes are a much darker green than usual. His pupils are dilated, and her breath hitches when she realises that he's aroused.

Aroused by _her._

Liv doesn't know who was the first to move, him or her, but suddenly, she's pinned against his door, his hands on her face as he tugs her head towards him. His lips collided with hers, and they're kissing, and it's frantic and desperate. He bits down on her bottom lip, demanding entry into her mouth, and she lets him in without hesitation, groaning as his tongue tangles with hers.

His fingers are now digging into her hips as he kisses her harder, and she has her hands in his hair, tugging at it as she sucks at his tongue.

Barba reaches behind her and turns the doorknob, and they both stumble into his apartment, lips still fused together. As the door slams shut, Liv uses the height advantage she has due to her boots, spinning them around and shoving _him_ against the wall. She grinds herself against him, and smiles to herself when she feels the very physical evidence of his arousal.

He cups her ass, pulling her to him, as he presses a kiss to the side of her neck. He then trails his tongue down her neck, tasting the saltiness of her skin, nipping at her pulse point. She gasps, tugging at his hair as he licks lower still.

Somewhere at the back of her mind, she thinks that this maybe isn't the best decision they're making, but she's past the point of caring. If she can be truthful to herself, she had wanted him for a while now.

And it seems like the wanting is mutual.

He's kissing the curve of her breasts above her tube top, pushing back her denim jacket. She's about to remove her top when he stops her, stilling her hands. He brushes his thumbs over her nipples, and she gasps, feeling her nipples harden almost instantly. He smiles at her reaction, and then he bends down, and licks her right nipple through the fabric. She moans at the sensation of his tongue teasing her sensitive nipples, and then with one swift movement, he tugs down her tube top, and his tongue is rasping against her bare nipple, licking, toying and sucking.

She cries out, holding his head against her breasts, and she swears she can sense him smiling in that infuriatingly arrogant way of his as he switches to her left nipple, sucking and biting lightly, before pulling back and blowing cool air on it, making her whimper.

His fingers are inching up her miniskirt, pressing against her inner thigh, and he looks straight into her eyes as he moves his fingers further up to her core.

His eyes widen as he realises that she's not wearing any underwear, and it's her turn to smirk at him. Her moment of smugness, however, does not last long at all, as he slips two fingers into her wetness, and her knees instantly buckle with pleasure. She presses her hands against the wall to steady herself, as Barba manipulates her with his fingers, making her even wetter than she already is.

But he doesn't want her to come with his fingers inside her, and neither does she. She grabs his hand as she feels herself coming close. She locks her lips to his again, kissing him fiercely as she pulls down his sweatpants, and then his boxers.

She grips his erection skilfully, moaning into his mouth when she feels how hard and ready he is. He groans low in his throat when he feels her hands on him, and he pushes into her hands as she strokes him.

She hitches up her tight miniskirt, bunching the material around her waist, and draws him closer to him, when he pulls back a little.

"Wait," he says breathlessly, reluctantly tearing his mouth away from hers. "Protection."

"My jacket," she murmurs, dragging his head to hers, and kissing him again. Somehow, he manages to reach into one of the pockets, and remove the condoms inside.

He pulls away from her, and stares at her. "Can I ask why would you have condoms in your jacket pocket whilst undercover?"

She laughs, tearing the condom wrapper, and rolling the condom onto his erection. "Part of the costume. Or…" she leans closer to him, and nibbles his earlobe. "Maybe I figured that I'll be fucking you before the night is over."

Barba's eyes darken further with arousal as he smirks back at her. Without warning, he shoves himself inside her, and he's hard and thick enough to make her cry out in pleasure. It isn't the easiest for her, wobbling in those knee high, four-inch boots with her hands to the wall, nothing really to hold on to. His hands are possessively clutching her hips as he moves against her. But it's perfect and fast, an angle that let him thrust deep inside her, enough to make her whimper each time their bodies came together.

He leans in to kiss her, his tongue demanding and authoritative, as he lifts her up a little, allowing her to hook one booted leg around his waist. He's still thrusting into her hard and fast, and their new position is giving her new waves of ecstasy.

She's close now, and he can feel it, so he pushes even deeper and bites down on her lip. She clamps down around him, and shudders, crying out shamelessly, as her climax almost overwhelms her. He continues driving himself into her, wanting to prolong her pleasure, but watching her come apart is his undoing.

He joins her in orgasm, and they ride it out together, and then they both slumped breathlessly against the wall, still tangled up in each other.

She rests her head against his chest, and listens to his heartbeat slowing, as he runs his hand through her hair. Gradually, their senses return to them, and they look at each other, realising the enormity of the act that had just taken place.

"That was…fucking amazing," he said, still breathing heavily.

She gives him a sly smile, as she presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth, and stands up, albeit shakily on her boots. "I told you I'm good."

"Liv," he says, catching his hand as he gets on his feet as well, pulling up his pants. "I…we…that can't be it, right?"

She stops in the act of readjusting her skirt and top, and turns to look at him. "…Rafael?"

"I don't want this to be a spur-of-the-moment, one-time thing," he says resolutely, his eyes fixed on hers.

A million thoughts are racing through her as she looks at him. For the first time in all the years they have known each other, Barba looks vulnerable and unsure.

There's going to be a lot of complications going ahead, there's going to be a lot to work though, but fuck all of that, she knows what she wants.

"I don't, either," she says, and a smile breaks over his face. He grabs her, and kisses her, and this kiss has none of the frantic, urgent passion of their earlier kisses. He kisses her leisurely, and tenderly, worshipping her mouth, and she does the same.

"Can you stay?" He asks against her lips.

She nods, winding her arms around his neck. "Lucy is with Noah tonight."

Barba smiles at her slowly, and taking her hand, he leads her to his bedroom. He sits her down on his bed, and brushes her hair back from her face. She reaches up, and rests her hand on his face, her fingers gentle on his cheek.

"I'll never be opposed to you fucking me, Rafael Barba, but right now, I want you to make love to me."

"Gladly."

He kneels down in front of her, and unzips her right boot, tugging it off. "I don't know how I feel about these boots," he remarks, as he takes off her left boot. "On one hand, they're such a turn on, and on the other, I hate that it makes you taller than me."

Liv laughs, and stands up, tugging him to his feet. Bare-footed, he's now just a fraction taller than her. She presses a kiss to his jaw, and pulls his T-shirt over his head while he pulls down her miniskirt. His sweatpants are the next to go, and she strips off the tight tube top.

They're now naked, bare to each other, and she thinks that she should feel self-conscious, but she doesn't, not even a little bit. He knows her so well, and he should know every single bit of her.

She casts a glance at her discarded, ridiculous costume. "Would you have wanted me if you didn't see me dressed in those clothes tonight?" She ponders.

He steps closer to her, and kisses the side of her neck. "I've wanted you since the day I met you," he admits.

She gives a little sigh of pleasure, and tilts her neck, giving him more access. He runs his hand down her bare back and over the curve of her spine. She can feel his arousal building, pressing against her thigh.

Barba eases her down on his bed gently, and slides down her body, pressing kisses to her breasts, her stomach, her hips. She knows where he's going, and her fingers curl around the sheets in anticipation.

He settles between her legs, and she's ready for him, slick and wet as he slides a finger into her.

"Rafael," she moans, and she pushes back against his touch, even when he inserts a second finger and crooks them inside her, moving in tandem with her efforts. He hooks one arm around her thigh, and presses his mouth against her center. He licks her wet folds, running the tip of his tongue leisurely against her little bundle of nerves as she cries out inarticulately. He keeps his fingers inside her, moving in rhythm with his mouth. He laps and sucks, and Liv is beginning to see stars, feeling spasms of pleasure building in her body. Her legs open even more for him, as she lifts her hips, pushing into his mouth.

He laughs breathlessly even as he continues to move his tongue and fingers inside her. She's very close now, and she feels her stomach twisting as her body contracts, and then she's shouting out her release, her climax rocking through her intensely.

Barba moves up to kiss her, and she tastes herself on his tongue, and it's so erotic, and so intimate. She slides her hand down between their bodies, and caresses his erection, feeling him harden under the manipulation of her fingers. She kisses his neck, and nips as his pulse as she pumps him, and he moans, his head falling against her shoulder.

She runs her hand over him one last time, and then slowly, she rolls the condom on expertly, and guides him into her. She feels so good, so hot, and so wet around him, and wanting to give her the pleasure she's giving him, he starts to move, thrusting into her with long, languid strokes. He kisses her forehead, her eyelids, her cheeks as he pushes himself into her. She wraps her legs around his waist, urging him to go deeper, raking her nails down his back. He's filling her up, stretching her, and it feels so, so good.

Keeping himself inside her, Barba rolls them over, so that she's now on top. She takes advantage of the new position, deftly adjusting herself, sitting up and grinding herself against him. She's beginning to feel pleasure in different parts of her, the new angle allowing her to grip him harder as she rocks against him. Barba groans, his hands on her hips, holding her in place as she pushes herself down on him. He trails one hand up, and cups her breast, rolling her nipple, and then pinching it lightly. She gasps, the slight pain adding on to her pleasure.

Liv can feel herself teetering on the edge, and she's about to go over. She reaches down, and rubs herself as Barba thrusts upwards into her, and she sees his eyes widen with lust as she touches herself. He raises himself a little, and she leans down to meet him as their mouths collide in a kiss.

"Liv," he pants, nipping at her lips. " _Olivia."_

She has never heard her full name sound so erotic, so needy. "Come with me, Rafael," she breathes in his ear, and he moans.

Their tongues clash together in a battle for dominance as their pace increases, frantic, frenzied, and with one final thrust, Liv goes over the edge, and he swallows her scream of release through their kiss, and it isn't long before he joins her, thrusting one last time and holding himself inside her as he reaches his own climax.

She collapses on top of him, sweaty and breathless, as he threads a hand through her hair, his own breathing erratic as he tries to regain his senses.

Barba reaches for his blanket, and covers their bodies with it, securing his arm around her shoulders. He can see that her eyes are gradually slipping shut, as she slings her arm around his waist.

He can feel contentment rushing over him as he looks at her. He kisses her forehead, and tucks her hair behind her ear.

"I think I'm falling for you," he whispers.

She tightens her arms around him, and smiles. "I've already fallen."

And he knows he has, too.

 _end_


End file.
